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Martial Arts FunniesAny funny martial arts jokes or stories....
Don't know if this has been discussed before, but what is the funniest/most embarrassing thing that has happened to you in a martial arts school??
For me it has to be hurt pride, I had not long started out in TKD, and thought I could beat the assistant instructor in a friendly sparring match... All was going well until he did an outer crescent kick with his right leg which I beautifully ducked. Unfortunately it was actually an axe kick and I stood up into the downcoming heel! Put me right on my ass to the enjoyment of everyone else and caused muscle spasms in my neck so i couldn't train for 6 weeks... My fault for being cocky I guess but they still won't let me forget it!
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We had a tradition before big tournaments of showing whatever forms we were taking to the entire class. I had been working on a spear form for a long time and finally had it polishied enough to take. I got up in front of 30 or so students and started the form. The form started of with figure eight strikes moving into a one handed stab with a very low cat stance. I nailed it perfectly, but when I did I heard the rip of the velcro on my pants let go. Then I felt a little drafty as I stood there in a perfect stance with the spear held out in front of me one handed, perfectly horizanal, and my pants around my ankles.
lol i was trying out kendo.....um what i didnt realise is they tap one another on the helmet, not smash it, well, the instructor told me to hit and i smashed im over the head......he then politely told me i was only suposed to tap, and the class was looking at me like i was the devil incarnate.....decided kendo wasnt for me..........just happy he didnt waste me, butit was genuinely a mistake....
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第二條規則 著述是回到第一條.
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To win or lose is not of importance, it is what you learn from the battle that is to be valued.
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For me it was when I decided I was ready to break boards. The entire class gathered around as I attempted to do it. And for the life of me I could not break those beginner level boards.
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Formerly Known as Hajilee... embrace the change.
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I was teaching in my own dojo, and felt it build up....and about 1/2 way through class, I let er rip. Huge fart right in the middle of class. I tried to cover it up with a loud kia, but no go.....plus...it was a pretty leathal one at that. Pretty embarrassing.
My worst moment was during training the kata Pinan Godan. It has a turning jump in it, and when I landed, I slipped on a puddle of sweat on the wooden floor and BAM. Considering that I weigh 110 kgs, it was pretty loud and painful
most embarrassing thing for me in the dojo was doing low blocks in reverse 5 years ago, my ankle going and me going into a seizure on the spot.....lol I was so embarassed and didn't want to go back incase I got laughed at but I did go back and glad I did. Hasn't happened since tg.
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Most embarassing thing that happened to me was when I first started taking Protien Powder. I was stinking out my classes for about two weeks before my system finally got used to the stuff.
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I remember in TKD class i felt a fart building up all lesson, and about on hour later i felt like i exploded. It didn't smell but it was load and then the Sensai tried to calm the class by saying "guys, feel free to drop one in the dojan" didn't do much calming to be honest.
I farted trying to break out of a triangle from guard.
And I remember kicking a bag while we had onlookers and ending up on my rear due to losing footing.
Also I did an axe kick in my gym and ended up on my toosh too.
Worse than all of that though. I was squatting at my gym using 250 for 5 reps a set. Every rep I farted. It was very very embarrassing. I didnt even finish the workout. To this day I make sure I take a good deuce before starting a legworkout.
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Even the best of men are capable of the most disgusting evil. Just as the most evil man is capable of showing kindness.
Do not be fooled into thinking your enemy's sin is worse than yours, or that your's is better than his.
Also, My wife gets very irritated when I get gas. I have to let em rip because it is actually very painful if I don't. She didn't believe me until we went to the dr's office one day because I was in pain. There in the exam room, I couldn't hold it anymore and I let it out...silent, but VERY deadly. Amazingly, I was CURED! I got up, and walked out of the room. The Dr. was just getting ready to come in. I told him I was fine and didn't need to be seen afterall. He asked if I was sure which I said I was. As I kept walking, he told a nurse to check the room for a mess because it stunk really bad. LOL Oh well. My students always know when I've had strogonof for dinner the night before. LOL
what is the funniest thing that has happened???
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